Lazy and Lepak Me

A very nice song indeed. I especially love the part with piano, hopefully one day I will get to play it.

徘了徊了走了 错了过了等了
累了全都困了 烦的乱的等的
都是真的

疯的想的念的 不安的焦虑的
复杂的梦过的 拥有的失去的
怎么忘呢

你做过的伤 放困了你爱的音
那天的我等着你等成了摆设

我的你的他的 好的坏的难的
灰的蓝的黄的 酸的甜的苦的
都还记得

非常想要忘的 绝对不能忘的
我心要换你的 真的不行那么
只得放了

环岛的火车载着我第几天了
忽然发现这一刻我不想你了

我的快乐 会回来的
只要清楚曾爱得那么深刻
不准问值不值得

我的快乐 会回来的
离开不是谁给了谁的选择

Yesterday, Sim asked us - do you know where you will settle down? It does make me ponder because I am hesitate to say that it will be Malaysia where I was born. I love my country but there are many reasons that stop me from going back or settling down. Till now, I have no answer for this.

Anyway, I will be home soon ... hopefully everything will go as scheduled.

when I say I want to be in love again

I miss those kisses and hugs T_T

I think It Started With A Kiss & They Kiss Again are darn good Taiwan series with good actors & actresses. Suddenly Wu Zhun is not that great anymore =p

Oh, suddenly my life is filled with love and imaginations...wahahhahaha

Okay, enough craps. Back to work.

又哭了， 多久没有流泪了？ 今天的我， 真的很伤心。

就像心狠狠被人刮了几刀的感觉。 今天那番话， 让我想起以前那个他。 我曾经逼问那个他为什么他要放手，他说：”和你一起， 我不快乐“。虽然只是短短几个字， 但杀伤力却足以把我击倒。今天， 你说的话，伤我更深。 没有想过你会说出这番话，也没有想过我的努力尝试会带给你压力。

我也会累， 我也会害怕， 我也有不想说话的一天， 可是你懂吗？ 当我在苦苦挽回和维持时， 你做过什么？

当一个人，已经不再在乎你的感受了，也懒得再去做些什么来挽救时 。。。一切都变得非常的明显了， 他不再爱你了！
我没有在通话时流泪，我倔强的认为，你真的不值得了。 我不恨你， 你很好， 我只是没这个福分。

欺骗了自己那么久， 也是时候醒醒了， 虽然残酷的现实让我伤痕累累。

I am really unsatisfied with the current situation and why do I have to keep convincing myself that I am fine.

Just to wait till the day I am back?

There's really no point if I am the only one who's working hard to maintain this.

Is it because I am the one who chose to come here so I have to take in whatever shit that you are giving me?

I am really angry and disappointed now!

edit: I have to clarify, I am not angry just feeling helpess. Instead of convincing myself to accept things as they are, I am convincing myself to let things go. Being too persistent will only hurt myself or maybe others. Please give me strength to go on for I have been a loyal person ... haiz.