It's Still the Same Old Me

还能不能
你后悔了你道歉了
总算死了的心又开始骚动着
以为懂了真看透了
你唤了我的名字
我却就又回头了
曾以为从此你就是她的
现在你却说你还可以是我的
但我忘不了你曾是她的
我们的世界已不再是原来的

还能不能恢复我要的幸福
还能不能回到爱情的地图
If you come back to me
我能否不去记住
你曾给的那些痛苦
还能不能承受你手指碰触
还能不能感受你怀里温度
If you come back to me
曾被你背叛的我
怎么相信你不会再让我哭

还能不能恢复我要的幸福
还能不能回到爱情的地图
If you come back to me
我能否不去记住
你曾给的那些痛苦
还能不能承受你手指碰触
还能不能感受你怀里温度
If you come back to me
曾被你背叛的我
怎么相信你不会再让我哭

I haven't been blogging in English for a while because I always feel that I can express my feelings better in Chinese. Or you can say I am very bad in English o_0

 

My life has been like a roller coaster since I came back from London. Be it work or relationships. So much had happened for the past few months. I've been through countless ups and downs. I almost wanted to give up everything in Malaysia (except my family of course) and go back to London or maybe OZ to continue my studies. However, I know well that I can't runaway forever. No matter how far I go and how hard I try to avoid, everywhere is the same and no one can guarantee I will be happy/feel better at the other end of the world.

 

3 months ago, I was drowning in sadness which I thought will never go away. I've shed so much tears and gone through so many sleepless nights. At the same time, I was over-stressed with my new job and also having problems to accept the changes in friendship. I doubted my decision to come back.

 

BUT ... afterall, I am thankful. I am thankful because I have a lovely family - sorry ba, ma, for always going home late =(. If I am not back, I wouldn't be able to know or get close to bunch of cute colleagues.  I am thankful because I have great friends around me. I am thankful because he never thought of letting go (although I am still not sure if it's a good or bad thing). I am thankful I have been given a good job opportunity (although it's torturing me now -_-). I feel grateful for where I am now.

 

It has been a painful experience but life goes on no matter what.

 

P.S. 谢谢， 你和你陪我度过了最难熬的那一段日子。